LET’S GO TRIBAL

Foreword:

I saw Leaf on Thursday. He was on good form, wolfed down the cherries and biscuits I brought and listened to me waffling on. Occasionally he started to say something which could’ve turned out to be coherent but then tailed off into indecipherable mumbling. I continued to waffle then a big wave of emotion threatened and I had a job keeping my voice steady and tears from my eyes. Normally, I’m good at controlling my feelings. 

I told him about the project I’m working on saying we’ll be doing it together when he’s better. ‘What d’you mean?’ he asked. ‘I’m fine, there’s nothing wrong with me.’ I was shocked but quickly realised that’s a good thing. He has no idea he has AD. Thank God and long may this last. He isn’t at all depressed and that’s amazing. So many AD patients are. (the pic is the last photo taken of him about 18 months ago)

When people ask me how I’m doing, I say ‘As a woman living on her own, I’m doing well and am as content as can be expected. As the wife of the most amazing man who’s dying a long, slow death, I’m desolate.’ 

But I’m optimistic. 

SO LET’S GO TRIBAL

I’ve written about returning to some of the old ways of living, to buying local, seasonal produce, growing our own, creating our own distractions, checking out natural remedies and concentrating on putting our energies into our local community. In other words, returning to tribal values. But to go a little deeper …

Despite, in many cases, Western intervention, lots of tribal peoples all over the world are still functioning the way they have for centuries. Why? Because it works for them. Going the ‘whole hog’ would clearly not be practical for us Westernised people, but we could a learn a great deal by looking at how their societies operate. 

For a start, they work on the principle of co-operation, mutual support and sharing. Everyone looks after everyone else, they’re not competing for food, resources, land, things. When the men go out hunting, they go as a group, working as a team. Those who stay behind, the women and old folk, work together cooking, crafting, sewing and gardening.

Effectively, they are creating. Cooking from the wild, making pots, baskets, furniture etc. sewing bedding and clothes, making jewellery and growing, both crops for food and for weaving, medicines and building materials. Hard work is involved, of course, but what a blissful way to spend the days, immersed in creativity. 

There is a tribal heirarchy of sorts based on the ability/suitability of whoever is chosen to be chief spokesperson, healer or spiritual teacher. 

In the evening, round a campfire, there’s discussion, music, maybe dancing. The children who have spent their time learning from the adults and elders and, of course, playing, are put to bed exhausted. Young people go off together, the village elders tell stories and the smokers smoke. 

Traditional ritual ceremonies and entertainments bring occasional, often seasonal, spice to life. Worldwide,we humans enjoy dressing up, painting our faces and bodies and horsing around. 

Nothing new here, we all know about the simplicity of their lifestyle, but how many of us would welcome a ‘modernised’ version of tribal society? Actually, those of us whose lifestyles are more traditional with a multi-generational family unit and a community we may well have known all our lives, could be considered ‘tribal’, without the shared day-to-day living spaces. Rural France is a very good example. 

And, to reminisce, I remember way back in ’61, when my friend, Annie, and I were on holiday in Cornwall with beatnik friends. We would go down to the beach, light a fire, eat jacket potatoes, swap stories, listen to poetry and someone would play folk songs on their guitar and we would dance. Everyone joined in with the favourites of the day ‘The Auld Triangle,‘ ‘Hava Nagila’ and, very important ‘We Shall Overcome Some Day‘ – so appropriate for what we’re facing now.

City living, nine-to-five jobs, fractured families, competition at every level and the quest for more and more money to meet our needs and desires, is another matter altogether and so many of us in the West have found ourselves on the treadmill. Is it time for a re-think? 

Of course, we can’t just change everything overnight but we could make some plans that will give us more time to enjoy the pleasures of life. If we want to change tack and ‘go back in time’, we will need to have identified our tribe – those people with whom we would like to share a more communal lifestyle.

As with Brexit, Covid has served to divide us, to make us re-consider our priorities, our morals, our approach to societal values and, our friendships. We find ourselves on one side or the other. We either believe the official narrative or we don’t.

To prove a point, I have to admit I thought Brexit was a disastrous idea and it’s clearly turning out to be pretty hellish for many people in a multitude of ways. However, the more I research the way the world is going, the more I am drawn to consider that sovereignity is a far better idea than globalism – a juggernaut of control that would have us all suppressed. We know the EU, like just about every government, is bankrupt, yet they’re all carrying on as if there’s an endless supply of money they can tap into whenever they like. We also know, or should know, that there is enough wealth on the planet to give each and every human being a comfortable lifestyle. The problem is, it’s in the wrong hands. The 1% are not about to distribute their obscene wealth to those they consider beneath them and therefore unworthy. At least, this has been the accepted ‘way of the world’ for centuries. Terrific! 

Some of us will shake our heads and say there’s nothing we can do, others of us will have vastly different views of the future. Only time will tell.

As for Covid – well, I can’t write a piece without mentioning the dreaded subject can I!? Many of us have discovered that the tribe we thought we belonged to isn’t really for us, as we aren’t for them. How many times have those of us who are ex-pats asked the question – ‘If I met these people in my home country, would we be drawn together. Do we have a lot in common, besides being ex-pats?” The answer could possibly be ‘No.’ But it’s understandable that we will probably feel more comfortable with at least a few people from ‘home’ – we’re foreigners and will likely be nervous of striking out on our own in a strange country, especially if the locals are a bit xenophobic! If we speak the language and are reasonably confident, we’ll probably be fine but, at first, most can’t and aren’t. And, or course, it’s up to us to make ourselves worthy of a friendly welcome by fitting in, even if we don’t have an enormous amount in common with those living around us. 

Once we’ve settled, we’ll seek out others with whom to fraternise and life is likely to continue on a pleasant enough level until there’s a crisis when we will huddle together in like-minded groups for safety. Anyone who doesn’t agree with our approach is left to find another tribe. 

We are finding our tribes!