I expect most of us will have noticed how much we can tell about people, their beliefs, priorities and general lifestyles from the contents of their supermarket trollies! They can be real eye-openers. Where they’re coming from is all there in what they buy!
Another way to learn a lot about those we know (and some we don’t), is to run a blog. For starters, looking at the ‘stats’ will tell us how many people have visited our site. Although, of course, we don’t know who those people are and they may well vary from week to week. I’ve been writing DOODAH since July 2018 and have clocked up 66 posts with an average of around 1000 words each, so 66,000 words! Not bad. During that time of going public, what have I learned? A lot.
LOLLYPOP TIME
My email list goes out to 184 people and there are around a dozen regular subscribers to the blog, hot-off-the-press readers! On average, I get around 90 ‘hits’ per post. The stats are therefore a good indication of which blog subjects get the most readers – definitely the more personal ones. However, DOODAH is about information and Leaf’s deterioration (I can’t think of a less horrid word) is to illustrate what AD can do to a person and how it affects the primary carer.
As a communicator (Gemini!), I’m compelled to pass on information, either verbally or through my writing. Research is very much a part of that progress. I delve into all sorts of unlikely sources in an effort to get a realistic overview on a range of subjects. Some are relevant to our lives, some simply interesting and some, distinctly disagreeable. These three all apply to dementia, its possible/probable causes, its progress and what, if anything, we can do to prevent and/or combat it.
MICROCOSMIC
Back to my readers or non-readers. They fall into several categories which is why I consider I’ve learned a lot – about people. I’m not claiming to be correct, but I can surmise. The categories are revealing. They seem to comprise:
Regular readers who:
- make the effort to comment on the blog itself
- email me direct as a caring response
- take the time to ring me up to have a chat and gauge how I am
- will feel they should, when we meet, comment briefly but clearly aren’t inviting a discussion
- say absolutely nothing
Then there are those who I suspect:
- bin my email without following up on the link
- have put DOODAH in their junk box to be cleared out with all the rest
Very few people have contacted me to ask that I take them off the email list, possibly for fear of offending me. Actually, they wouldn’t because I can understand the first three of the following reasons they might have:
- the subject is too depressing
- they’re embarrassed by people with dementia
- they’ve had to deal with AD themselves and the person has died and they want to move on
- they simply aren’t interested and can’t be doing with worrying about it if it doesn’t touch their lives
THE ARGUMENT
Do I think DOODAH is serving a useful purpose? I definitely do because there are those who are clearly grateful to have someone to whom they can communicate their feelings and get a response. There are also those who have lived with AD and who totally understand what it’s about and want to offer support and comfort. Thank you so much! I’m very lucky to have you in my life and, by extension, in Leaf’s life too.
How do I feel about lack of response? At times I’m very despondent, especially when those I consider friends clearly aren’t interested enough in our situation to mention it when and if I see them or they get in touch. Friends? Most would say not, but there are those who are completely unable to talk about distressing subjects. They will want to help us but keep discussion or emotional support at arms’ length. I feel sad for them as well as us.
A last point – some of what I have to say, my message, may be unwelcome. In days of yore, a messenger was often blamed for being a bringer of bad tidings and may even have been slaughtered on the spot. They were blamed for the contents of the message even though they were only passing it on. Of course, it could have been that the messenger knew too much and their lose tongue could have caused problems. I pass on information that I think is important and I admit it can be inconvenient, even very disagreeable. Listening and taking notice could involve a change of lifestyle which the majority don’t want to entertain. They prefer to ignore the message, even if it’s vitally important that they don’t. The messenger can become the subject of ridicule (conspiracy theorist is the favourite), a fear-monger or, at the very least, a naïve believer of nonsense theories.
TRIBUTE TO VINCENT
My reaction is to ignore their accusations, to pass on what I think is important and to take measures in my own life to protect, as far as possible, against whatever the danger might be. Usually I will include information about protective measures as part of spreading the word about what I’ve gleaned from a variety of plausible, reliable sources (ie with no obvious agenda). Some tell me not to be worrying myself about the nasty stuff of the world. I don’t. I take action if possible or tuck the info away for future ref. if required. I’m basically a happy, positive person with a purpose in life.
My latest purpose is to let you all know about Leaf’s exhibition so here below is all the info. We really hope you’ll be able to come, if not to the vernissage, then to have a look at his work at some point during the following week. We won’t be in attendance every day but let us know if you’re coming from outside the region and we’ll do our best to answer any questions or get together if appropriate.
doodahtwo.home.blog 
Hello Sue
David and I are away at the moment but these days one can be permanently in touch.
We are looking forward to Leaf’s exhibition on the 21st March.
I find that many people I talk to about the subject closest to my heart see me as being far too out spoken and negative. It is true that there are few people who will speak their minds (or have strong opinions about the many things that are wrong with our world) and far too many just bury their heads in the sand. So I take my hat off to you Sue. I have finally opened my eyes to many of the world’s wrong that you and Leaf have talked to me about over the years, you both noticed and researched them way before me.
Keep up the good work and I for one am always interested and often moved by your blogs.
See you on Saturday xxx
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Thank you Adrienne. It’s good to have opinions and to have the courage to voice them. Those that don’t so often accuse us of being opinionated because we’re passionate and forthright. I could never sit on the fence or have a mainstream opinion just because I want to be popular. Amazing how many people are concerned so much about what others think of them. So much so, they’re afraid to speak out. A sad and cowardly lot!!! In today’s world, we simply cannot sit back and pretend it’s all hunky-dory, we have to do what we can for our planet and all the wonderful wildlife that’s so horribly threatened. Spreading the word and signing the many petitions fighting to protect them is the least we can do. Look forward to seeing you at the expo, if not before. Your ongoing support is marvellous. xxx
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Evening Sue
Interesting to read the statistics. I find I sometimes go for weeks without reading your blog then have a time when I can catch up and read several at once ! Tonight I have been able to read it straight away.
I really love you have popped in some of leaf’s paintings. They are also wonderfully bright and i can’t wait to see them at the exhibition 🙂
Big hugs to you both
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Yes, it thought it would be encouraging to include some of Leaf’s paintings. I think you will like the originals, they have an interesting texture, rather like oils, making them even more special.
Re. stats, reading several posts at once counts as views, whereas reading just the latest counts as a visit. All this tech speak! Hope all going well with the organisation of the big event at St. G. Wish we could take part, but it would be too much for us. Big hugs back.
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Love lollipop time! Wish I could be there and wish you the best for the expo xxk
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Thanks Kip, I’ll pass that on to Leaf. I love Lollipop Time too. Wish you could be with us but flying isn’t the best idea at the moment. I will include more pics with the next blog and posting about the results after the expo. xxx
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Hello Sue, I would just like you to know that I read all your posts even though I haven’t commented on them. I have not had any contact with Alzheimer’s Disease, so your writings are a sad introduction for me. I feel deeply for Leaf and you, but don’t think anything I could write would help in any way. I know you are doing everything posible and admire you for that. Keep it up and I hope you will keep posting whenever you feel like it. Love and peace, Max.
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Hello Max, It’s good to hear from you. Even though you may not have contact with people living with dementia, it’s a disease that is increasing exponentially. In my earlier blog posts I talked about contributory factors and preventive measures. I believe anyone over, say 30, should be aware that how we live our lives will dictate our health in later life.
As for Leaf, I’m convinced that the horrors of his childhood are a good part of the reason why he has AD. Losing his mother at age 6, being sent to a brutal boarding school, suffering with his siblings the rule of a horrible stepmother and, to put the nail in the coffin, as it were, his father sending him off penniless at age 18 when he was about to profit from university. He defends his father’s reasoning, but I certainly don’t. Apparently he’d said whilst L and the others were still children that he would support them until they were 18 then they were on their own. What the future would have held for him, we’ll never know. I think all this has blighted his subconscious despite the awakenings from acid. Note: I will be reporting in due course about the research and treatment work going on at Imperial College with psychedelics to treat a range of psychological problems and brain diseases. So far, their results have been amazing! Love and peace and positive energy is winging its way back to you. xx
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Hi Sue,
I will definately try to come on the 21st if I can.
I”m one of those who doesn’t always read your blog. Simply because I’m always short of time and at this particular moment in my life, its not a topic I’m directly affected by. However , I do see that this is an incredibly valuable resource you are creating here and I have directed several people to it who I know it will be very useful.
So, I stay on your email list, not because I’m embarressed to ask you to remove me, but because I do like to dip in where I can and share your work where it’s most relevant.
All the very best to you both x
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Thank you Nikki. You, like me, try to keep abreast of as much as possible alongside a very busy life. It’s good to know my posts are being passed on and I hope they’re helping people coping with this horrible disease.
Hope to see you on the 21st but if you can’t make it that day and want to come over in the week, let me know and we’ll come down to CM and meet you and have a coffee. Love and positive energy winging its way to you. xx
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Hi Sue
I’m reading thank you and apologies for not engaging but you’re both often in our thoughts.
Hug to you both xxx
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Thanks Amanda. The energy from thoughts is very strong. xxx
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Dear Sue and Leaf,
Lovely to see these paintings by Leaf, I particularly like the rhythmic delicacy in his Microcosmic and Tribute to Vincent, and of course Gill and I hope many people will come to view his work in the brief time that it runs. How swiftly time now passes. Have been reading all your words of late, pondering on them as they stay with one and there are always resonances to my own mental state at a similar age to Leaf, and how easy it is to become overwhelmed by it all, even though I still don’t have a mobile phone yet!
Much Love and Best Wishes to you both from us – Robert & Gill xxxxxxx
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Hi Robert and Gill, Leaf’s paintings are interesting and full of life and colour. We can see so much in them. We are hopeful that the exhibition will go well.
I’m glad you find my blog posts thought-provoking – it’s good when we resonate – we are, after all, beings of frequency. Good on you, not having a mobile. Awful things that are robbing the young of their youth and taking humans over in so many ways. I hate them. Lots of love back to you and Gill xxxx
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I’m looking forward to seeing you on the 21st and to see
Leafs work! Sending love to you both xxxx
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Hi Gin, and we’re looking forward to seeing you too. It’s been too long. Lots of love back, xxxx
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